You knew I couldn’t stay gone forever. I just can’t keep my mouth shut for that long.
Hi. Did you miss me? I missed you.
So welcome to my brand new web home. I think this is my 180th site at this point – it feels like I’ve been through so many online incarnations that I’m suffering from multiple personality disorder. So that’s why I decided it’s finally time to have my own damn name as my own damn web identity. It seems to make more sense that way what with the book(s) and all coming out.
Oh, right. I suppose I should provide some history for those who haven’t got a fucking clue what I’m talking about, and an update on my whereabouts for those who do.
First, the (recent) history. Over four years ago during the 2001 economic drought I started working in the porn industry, first as a writer and later as a publicist. I did so with the intention of writing a book about it some day. I had no idea what the hell I was going to write, but I figured there had to be something interesting to say about it other than “It ruins lives!� and other like-minded jibberish. While doing the publicity thing, I recorded my semi-regular blitherings on the subject . It was fun. But then it grew old – all of it. So I shut the site down in April after my 500th post and quit doing porno PR. In the middle of all that I started working on my first book: an anthology of writings from women in and around the industry called Naked Ambition (it’s coming out this October.)
I celebrated my departure from the industry by allowing my boyfriend, Dr. Troy, to whisk me away to the Bahamas, a trip that was also used to celebrate his birthday. And when I came home I started writing non-stop. I wrote profiles of Charlize Theron and Richard Gere for Industry Magazine, I wrote a profile of a recording studio in Santa Monica for EQ, I became a pitching machine and I finished the best book proposal of my life.
As an aside, there are few things that feel as good as finishing a solid book proposal and knowing it’s solid. Eating good chocolate is up there, having an orgasm that makes your legs go numb is pretty much on par, but man, finishing that proposal felt fucking amazing. The subject matter was something that I knew was going to coax into something wonderful one day, but I just couldn’t figure out exactly how I was going to turn straw into gold. And then, as inspiration tends to do, it hit me on the plane ride home from my tropical trip.
I was reading Disney War, pouring over the details of what led Michael “Satan Incarnate� Eisner to calling Jeffery Katzenberg a midget when I decided to take another look at the table of contents to get an idea of how such a dense amount of information was split up and categorized into a the book. And then it hit me like a bolt of lightning how to do the same with my proposal, which had been bothering me for months. I asked Dr. Troy to grab a flight attendant for me so I could beg for a pen, which they didn’t have. Being the resourceful young woman I am, I used the next best thing – MAC eyeliner. Five minutes later I had a full outline for the book scribbled on the back of a postcard and a flattened khol pencil in Smolder. I then had to sit on the plane for another two and a half hours, cursing myself for not bringing my laptop with me so I could get started on it right away instead of having to wait to saddle up at my desktop.
Within a week of sending it out to a handful of New York lit agents, a bunch started courting me, and I narrowed it down to four possibilities. Two weeks after that I made my decision and signed with one who was as enthusiastic about the project as I was. Said book proposal is now in the hands of the top publishing houses. I’ve had phone conferences. I’ve asked and answered questions. I’ve laughed, I’ve become frustrated, I’ve put the whole thing out of my head a million times to try not to obsess over it, only to get another e-mail from my agent telling me good news. The whole process has been incredibly fascinating, and it’s not over yet. I’m looking forward to where this is going to land.
And then I became bored out of my fucking mind.
June seemed to be booming business-wise – I was swamped with work between writing gigs and solidifying the book proposal for pitching and whatnot, but when I returned home from a 4th of July trip to Pebble Beach everything was at a standstill. I tried to busy myself with some consulting work in addition to working on the press tour for the first book and all that kind of stuff, but with the tour not even starting until end of October it was kind of hard to make solid plans when people don’t even know what they’re going to do next week, let alone in the fall. And what’s more, FX stopped re-running Nip/Tuck so I couldn’t catch up on the episodes of season two that I hadn’t seen yet! Though I like summer weather more the slowdown makes me crazy, which is why I’m much more a fan of fall and spring. Things are still happening then. As July crawled to a close I felt like my brain is leaking out of my ear.
So to pass the time I’ve been brainstorming and looking for work, reading far too many gossip sites and rags, becoming a fan of too many personal blogs, weight training and yogaing and running until I’m too crippled to walk, sun tanning, trip planning, hunting down obscure MP3s and praying that the universe will hear my boredom whines and step it up a little. Or at least allow more spoilers from the third season of Nip/Tuck to roll out prior to its debut (September 20th, and yes I have it on my calendar. I’m also happy to report that FX is rerunning season two again, so things might be looking up…)
Those of you who are used to the old blog are probably wondering what I’m trying to achieve here, and the answer is simple: nothing. You can expect more scintillating commentary of this sort (read: I’m going to write about whatever I damn well please) on a semi-regular basis (read: when I feel like it) from here on in. But please, I beg of you – let’s keep the porn to a minimum. Definitely no more e-mails asking me how to get into the industry. And most important of all, do not send me pictures of your cocks. It’s time for a new era on this blog, and though there may be periodical porn mentions, they will be few and far between so as to save the good shit for the forthcoming book… and I promise you, it will be good shit. Mostly this blog will be a place for me to ramble on opinionatedly about everything from pop culture crap – hence the title of every entry will be a quote from a favorite TV show, movie or song (feel free to guess where the quotes came from, and when moved, I might send out prizes for doing so) – to writer’s block.
So there.
Huge, huge thanks go to Joelle from Moxie Design Studios for the fabulous design, and for putting up with my hundreds of last-minute fixes. Huzzah!
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